no one should be alone for christmas
by ChildofBabylon
Summary: Set at the end of series three. It is christmas and the Guv is in his office remembering her.   Remembering the christmas before.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I do not own these fabu characters unfortunately, as they belong to the BBC and Kudos.  
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**Hey Guys,**

** so I'm new to writing Ashes to Ashes fic but believe me that does not mean I'm new to the story, I've put off doing these two lovely character's stories because I'm never sure whether I am able to capture their personalities right but Ah well, its christmas so i thought I'd give it a shot. I did origionally only want to write a one shot but have since decided to make it into a short story but anyway here is the first update...**

**Tilly x x x  
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><p>Chapter 1<p>

Gene Hunt sat in his office in Fenchurch East CID resting his head on one hand and the other hand toying with the whisky tumbler on his desk. He watched the little amber liquid that was left swirl around in the bottom and wash up the sides as he sighed heavily in his chair. Things were different last year; he had friends and co-workers around him. He had Bolly.

True, it wasn't the portrait fairytale Christmas that people usually thought of but it had been perfect for him. He wouldn't have admitted at the time but spending Christmas with Alex had been the best way to spend the holiday. It had started on Christmas Eve when all of CID had decided to trot over to Luigi's for their regular and everyone soon got a little too drunk. All the lads were staggering, singing, arguing and joking with one another and Gene Hunt had sat proudly and a little drunkenly at the small table in the far corner of the small restaurant with his DI by his side.

"See Bolls, this is what it's all about, Christmas, look at everyone." He had slurred as he waved a hand towards the rest of the group.

"You mean getting pissed off your face, so you can be a grumpy bastard in the morning?" Alex had giggled into her wine glass.

"No, look. Everyone getting on, having a fun, a laugh. I think even Ray might score wi' that bird tonight." His brow furrowed at the last comment but Alex had returned his smile. She leant down onto her forearms her head turned towards him and her eyes teasing.

"Who would have known the great Manc lion wanted good will for all men at Christmas time." She had bit her lip trying and failing not to giggle and the sound made Gene's stomach flip. He cleared his throat, slightly embarrassed.

"Yeah well. I try to be 'appy round this time. Not much point otherwise is it?" He grimaced pulling his gaze away from her beautiful hazel eyes.

"No I suppose not." Alex had sounded so upset that gene snapped his head around to look back at her, his face full of concern. He hated it when she had a funny turn and the outcome this time was that she was more than likely to burst into tears, in the restaurant and then she would realise she was making a spectacle in public and lash out at him. He couldn't let her do that. He turned himself fully to her and glanced quickly around the restaurant before pulling Alex in for a hug, his arms wrapped around her like a big safety net holding her together and keeping her safe.

"What are you doing tomorrow for Christmas Alex?" he asked his voice a soft purr in her ear.

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing. And I can't even see my little girl Gene and give her presents." The woman had sobbed quietly in his chest, her slight frame heaving as body shook with emotion. He had stayed holding and comforting her for fifteen minutes, after a while her sobbing had slowed and then stopped before he tried pushing her away only to realise that she had fallen asleep. He sighed, the woman always made things complicated and she had had a lot to drink tonight, He sighed, carefully he pushed her upright into a sitting position before picking her up as he had that very first time they had met. He motioned his head at Chris who weaved his way over.

"Alright Guv?" He asked and Gene remembered how his shoulders were slumped as if knowing he was going to be told off.

"Can you please get DI Drakes keys Christopher she seems to be asleep and drooling over my good tie!" Chris had helped him up the stairwell to the flat before disappearing back downstairs whilst Gene had deposited Alex in her bed fully clothed and had pulled the quilt over her.

"Sleep well Bolls." He murmured brushing her hair out her eyes before leaving.

He had gone back down to the bar after that and had settled himself with another scotch and was just raising the glass to his lips when he was interrupted.

" 'Ere Guv, reckon I do have a chance with that blond after all, she just asked me to her place." Ray waggled his eyebrows suggestively before giving a short laugh "Guess even she doesn't want to be alone for Christmas. Her husband's in Barcelona! Still a lovely bit a skirt."

Gene had given him a disgusted look before Ray turned away and walked out the restaurant with the woman, he had stood at the bar thinking over what Ray had said before collaring Luigi who was busy wiping glasses. When the little Italian had looked over, the little Italian had looked concerned and Gene lowered his voice so no one could hear him, his tone menacing.

"Luigi, a word."


	2. Chapter 2

Happy new year guys!

Sorry i'm a little late with this next chapter but I was in Scotland for the new year making snowmen WOOHOO! Anyway.. I wanted to say happy birthday to my friend because she is now officially an adult hahaha So here it is, and bear with because its not the end, I think they'll be a couple more chapters to welcome you into the new year though they are still christmassy.

Anyway I will let you read, I just cant help but ramble on sometimes so, let me know what you think whether its to tell me i'm okay or if I'm rubbish I love having feedback!

Tilly x x x

I do not own characters etc they are property of Kudos and BBC. -.- which is depressing because otherwise the ending would have been diferent... like this... or something similar anyway...

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><p>Chapter 2<p>

Gene had now stood up from his desk and had walked over to the filing cabinet his eyes cast down to look at the thin, worn and stained blue carpet. He pulled out the filing cabinets top drawer and leafed through a few documents before finding a manila envelope which he pulled out. He touched it gingerly as if afraid of the small package. On the front, it gave no indication to what was inside but it was clearly affecting the man who held it and he was well known to be strong, brave and often frightening. After a few moments he threw the envelope across the room until it landed with a soft thud on the floor by the waste bin. The great Manc lion had let himself remember and now he was paying the price that was almost too much for him to take, yet now he started to remember last Christmas he couldn't stop remembering her. Her face. Her laugh. Her tears. Her smile. Her eyes. So the man cowered away from his memories hid his face in his arms as he leant against the filing cabinet.

Christmas day the previous year Gene had found himself waking relatively early at 10 am considering the hard night of drinking the night before. He had dressed in his best suit with a black shirt; he had decided that if he was going to do this, he had to do it properly. So at lunch time he had plucked up the courage to drop by Luigi's flat to pick up the two Christmas dinners and now he found himself outside her flat. He tapped the door with his foot lightly before doing it a little harder.

"Open this bloody door Alex!" He roared and a few long minutes later the grumbling sound of his DI was heard as she came to open the door. When she peeled it open and glanced around to look at her boss her scowl turned from grumpiness to confusion. She pulled the door open wider.

"It's Christmas day Gene! What on earth are you doing here?" She asked tracing her long fingers up and down the side of her white wooden door. Gene looked to the floor clearly embarrassed and struggling to say what he was doing there, explaining his sudden appearance hadn't entered his mind the previous night.

"Well, erm. I thought you know after last night's talk. Maybe you wanted to spend Christmas wi'me here?" He looked up at her through his lashes and never before had she seen this arrogant, sometimes brutal and often complicated man seem so vulnerable. "If you don't want to tha's fine too Bolls. I can just leave you 'ere wi' your dinner."

Alex smiled her lips pulling up in the corners and making her, if possible, more beautiful. She had watched and seen his discomfort at having to struggle to explain his actions but she found it endearing. When she needed him he was there. Just now she had been lonely and he had called. Just like when her parents had been blown to Kingdom Come and he had been there to hold her younger self's hand and make her safe. She reached out her hands taking the plates from him and kissed him gently on the cheek. She paused to slowly breathe in his scent, that comforting smell that had always made her feel safe before she pulled away and headed for the kitchen. She switched the oven on, peeled back the foil and placed the plates inside to heat up.

"Make yourself comfy and open a bottle whilst I get ready. I'm sure you don't want to see me in pyjamas all day." She blushed lightly as she stepped towards the bedroom closing the door behind her gently. If Gene was honest with himself he hadn't cared what she wore whether it was her normal clothes, sleepwear or even a bin bag she still looked gorgeous. When she had turned away he had shook his head to try and get the mental image of her rumpled, messy curls and mid thigh silk night dress out of his head but he did as she asked and opened a bottle of red then began setting the small kitchen table for them both. After waiting for so long he had pulled out the two plates and placed them on the table.

"Hurry up Bolls, it's going ta get cold!" He called the faint trace of a smile tugging the corner of his mouth as the door opened at his command. Alex stepped out her eyes not leaving his as she slid around the door self consciously.

"Bloody 'ell Bolls, you trying to impress me?" He laughed as he had taken in the full sight of her. She was wearing her grey woollen dress with the red chunky belt along with what he hoped would be stockings too.

"I wear this at work sometimes, I even wore it when you stamped my arse" She giggled as she crossed the room towards the kitchen area.

"And what a great day that was, a real breakthrough. All the same though Alex, you look beautiful." He had said in a moment of tender seriousness, she replied with a blush which hadn't gone unnoticed by him, even as he had pulled out her chair and poured her a glass of red wine but before he returned to his seat opposite her he brought the back of his fingers behind her neck and lifted her wild curls. She shivered delicately beneath the fleeting touch.

"Erm, your hair was caught underneath you dress." He mumbled and she smiled her reply not quite able to find an appropriate response within her. They chatted about light subjects whilst they ate each enjoying the others company.

"Did you really cook this?" She asked in awe as she placed her cutlery down with a quiet clink.

"Course I didn't you dozy mare, I asked Luigi last night, who was only too happy to help." He had laughed. "But I did bring these."

He had opened his inside coat pocket and pulled out two Christmas crackers both gold and a rusty red with little sprigs of holly upon and handed one over to her. She took it from him her tongue behind her teeth in a cheeky expression.

"You always think of everything don't you?"

"Always." He replied catching her gaze and not being able to tear them away. "Well are we going to open these bloody things or not?"

She reached her hand out with the cracker and raised an eyebrow challengingly. He took a hold of the end with a firm grip. They pulled. Alex jumped back in her chair slightly once it had snapped and grinned when she saw she had won.

"Every single time" she winked as she felt inside the ripped opening, she picked out the paper party hat and placed it down on the table as a sign of refusal to wear it. Then she tipped the cracker upside down and watched as a plastic key ring fell out. She tutted but her smile gave her away.

"I'll win the next one you know," He said though his tone gave away the fact that he hadn't cared.

"Come on then, let's see if you're as strong as you make out." She teased. He held out his cracker and she took hold of it.

"You see Mr Hunt there's an art to winning these games, you just have to figure it out." She said her voice straining slightly as she pulled. When the cracker had snapped Alex had grinned in triumph at him.

"Told you." She stuck out her tongue at him.

"Go on then tell us how you do it." He said as he had sat himself on the edge of his seat as he watched her pull out the paper crown once more and place it on the table.

"Well if you, press down on the small cardboard tongue you usually win." She stated as she frowned.

"You cheated!" He accused as he watched her look into the end of the cracker, his heart racing.

"You asked!" She gave back. Alex cupped her palm as she tilted the cracker, watching as a neatly wrapped present fell onto her hand. Her brow furrowed a little more as she glanced up at him. He fidgeted in his chair uncomfortably as she looked at him, confused, before understanding dawned on her face.

"You didn't?" She asked her voice quiet with shock.

"It's just a little something Alex. It's only a Christmas present." He reassured her. She looked down at the gift and then back up again almost like she was trying to find a connection. Gently she slid a finger beneath the paper at the corner and popped up the sellotape before wriggling the small square box out. She picked it up between her fingers and glanced at the man in front of her waiting for permission, he gave her a small nod. Carefully she opened the lid and gasped at what was inside. Her eyes shot up to look at Gene in shock. Inside the box lay a silver necklace, it had small diamantes down one curve of the silver figure of eight and a pearl resting in between. One thing was definitely for sure, it wasn't just a 'little something.'

"Do you like it Alex?" He had asked her.

"Yes Gene, very much." She nodded as tears filled her eyes. He seemed to sense that she needed an answer to an unspoken question and so he told her.

"It's a symbol Alex, it represents you an' me, the side with the diamonds represents you- posh an' classy, whilst the other represents me- plain but bold and strong. We join together though Alex cos we're a good team. Unbreakable."

The tears flowed down her cheeks happily as she listened to him a smile gracing her face.

"You always manage to surprise me." She whispered as she came around the table, once she was in front of him bent down. "Thank you."

She whispered in his ear before pressing her lips against his, he felt the tears cool against his own skin and as they touched he brought his hand to her hip pulling her closer. She moaned in his mouth luxuriating in the contact that they had both craved for, for so long he tugged her into his lap her hands struggling to open the buttons of his shirt. She had only managed a few before she heard a shrill ringing. She stopped still leaning into him.

"Leave it," Gene whispered his mouth ghosting kisses over her neck, silently promising her what she had wanted. Alex waited to see if the ringing would stop when it didn't she sighed and pushed herself away apology written across her face. It only took her ten paces to reach the phone and when she did she snatched it up.

"Yes?" Alex hissed into the phone causing Gene to grin from ear to ear. "What do you mean I am needed in? ... Yes, I understand that Ray...Well, did you get ordered in by the Guv? No, you couldn't have because he is her-"

Before Alex had realised Gene had snuck up behind her and gently prised the phone away from her before speaking into it himself. As he was speaking into the phone he turned to look at Alex who was visibly seething next to him. After, he had put the phone down he turned to her, a pout on his face as he realised it wasn't just the fact he was being called into work on Christmas but the fact he was now dealing with a very angry and very grumpy Bolly.

"Sorry Bolls we're in work the Super wants us in. Apparently some Bastard decided to have a little fun cutting up some lass last night. So now we have a murder on our hands. Great."

"Why can't it wait until Monday though?" Alex knew that she was behaving like a spoilt kid and she knew that the family of the girl would be distraught too.

"Because Sulky knickers, this murdering twat was Santa and the Super wants us to make sure that the public are feeling safe about going out for boxing day and new year." Alex nodded knowing that he was right.

"Will you at least help put on my necklace?" She asked him, her big hazel eyes gazing up at him.

"Turn around then." And she did as he fumbled with the clasp until it was attached together. He stood back as she turned around his eyes fixated on the pendant. "Beautiful."

"Oi, stop staring at my tits!" She had joked her eyes fully lit up with happiness.

"I wasn't. I was looking at that pendant. Looks good Bolly." He smiled one of those rare smiles back and for once it had occurred to him that today he had probably smiled the most in his life.

"Yeah and you'll probably use that excuse for the rest of your life now," They both laughed as they headed towards the door, Alex slipped on her pair of red heels gaining a few extra inches of height.

As she had reached for the door Gene had stopped her, grasping hold of her hand and spinning her to face him. He pushed her curls away from her face, tangling his fingers between them as he kissed her. Alex's own hands found their way up to his shirt and twisting the material into fists as her need grew. He backed her against the door pressing the length of his body against her as she moaned into his mouth, both of their tongues battling for dominance. Eventually they had to come up for air and Alex rested her forehead against his trying to catch her breath.

"Merry Christmas Alex," He whispered and she giggled breathlessly back.

"Yes, Merry Christmas Gene." She replied kissing the corner of his mouth before they opened the door and set off for Fenchurch East, Alex was trying to restyle her hair and Gene was doing up the buttons his DI had undone earlier. They didn't know what would happen between them now, but they did realise that they had to remain professional whilst on the job.


	3. Chapter 3

Boo!

So, I know its a christmas fic but as you can tell its not quite finished and i cant wait till next year, can i? hahah and yes, im hoping to change the title so i hope it doesnt trick too many of you ;) Anywho have fun!

You know the drill by now-

I do not own any of the characters however, hard I wish for that to be different as they are all owned by the bbc and Kudos

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><p>Chapter 3<p>

Of course nothing had developed after Christmas day as they threw themselves into the young girl's murder case and then there had been the situation with Mac, then Summers and eventually Keats. They had been on a few dates together but somehow they were always interrupted or they ended up arguing. They grew apart, he shot her, and then everything got confusing. But she stood by him. She stood by him even when Ray, Chris and Shaz hadn't. She had helped him find himself. She was there to support him out on the field where his body lay. And then after everything, everything they had been through, everything they had shared he told her to leave, to go through the doors. She had kissed him those large eyes full of tears which were chasing the ones that were already cascading down her cheeks. Then she was gone.

Gene lifted his face from his arm and put his face in his hands, he pulled his hair. Why did he have to remember? Why hadn't he told her he loved her? He had seen the rejection on her face, the hurt that was so visible at having being told to leave him. He wished he could change that, those last looks of rejection and loss.

"Hello Gene," The soft voice flowed through the door of his office and he visibly jumped up. He stalked back around his desk arms outstretched in fear. He had finally lost it, how could he be expected to help everyone else crossover now when he was this messed up.

"Please don't look like that. It's me. I came back." The voice pleaded and had taken a step closer.

"NO! Go away. You're not real, you're not here. You left, you had to." He begged as she came closer to him still, she reached out a cautious hand and hesitated before dropping it down to her side.

"I said No!" He shouted at her, wishing that she would just disappear.

"Gene listen to me, I am here. I'm here for you tonight. I'm real" She reached out her hand to his face but didn't touch. She knew it had to be his decision to make. So Gene gulped suddenly realising that it was very hard to swallow and took her hand bringing it to his face. He sighed as he felt the skin on skin contact.

"Do you believe me now?" Alex had asked him stroking her thumb in a comforting gesture across his cheek. He nodded silently drinking her in. He decided if this was his madness he actually didn't mind it.

"I don't understand." Gene said after he had managed to gather his thoughts.

"Shh. I'm here, with you that's all that matters." She soothed but he pushed her away again.

"Why Alex? I sent you away so that, that Bastard couldn't get you. So you wouldn't end up like Viv." He seethed and his voice wobbled at the end which made him more defensive, Gene Hunt never showed weakness, his were hands balling into fists at his sides. She was unsafe here, with him. She watched as he began checking the corners of his office with a quick glance before turning to look out the window. He couldn't take a chance.

"Gene, look at me please." She reached out for his face turning him so she could cup his cheek in her hand, he looked at her. He looked into her eyes, those eyes. He would remember them forever, so beautiful and expressive, they told the truth when she tried to lie. She smiled gently at him "Whenever I am with you I_ am _safe."

Gene paused a minute revelling in the moment, enjoying the feel of her being there with him, but it just wasn't right. He had to make her see.

"You just do not understand do you Alex? I shot you once Alex, I could do it again! And Keats is out there, this hasn't been some kind of playground game. Everyone is dead. Shaz is dead. Chris is dead. Ray is dead. I'm dead. You're dead. Christ, that bastard nearly got you once, I can't let him win. I won't let him win. You lost your daughter Alex, when she finally dies, when she gets here do you want to meet her? Or do you want me to tell her that she can't see her mam again because she went to hell?" His voice had risen into a loud snarl, he knew what he was saying was completely uncalled for and below the belt but he had to keep her safe. His Alex had to be safe. He watched her as she stiffened.

"I don't care anymore! Can't you see? You can be so foolish so self centred, so ridiculously selfish and bullish and you always want to play the hero that you can't see what is being offered, you never bloody listen to anyone!" She yelled before stopping herself and closing her eyes tightly. She breathed in a couple of deep breaths before looking him in the eyes; they were searching him, pleading him. "I miss my daughter of course I do, but now it's not just her who I miss. It's not just her who I love."

She blushed and looked down to the floor as a tear dropped onto one of her perfect cheekbones. He lifted her chin and opened his mouth but then she cut him off.

"I can't see Molly now, I know that, I know I might never be able to again but I have been given a chance to see you and forgive me but I couldn't resist making the most of it. You shot me by accident, yet you have saved me more times I can count, you saved me the first day I met you from Markham, you made me feel safe in the vault we were stuck in, you saved me from the freezer and that was in the first few months. I have called you every name under the sun, treated you so badly, shouted, cursed and accused you yet you stood by me. " With this last sentence she half laughed though there wasn't a single trace of humour within it. "I'll go now Gene, don't worry. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have come."

Alex stepped out of his touch and turned towards the office door tears streaking her cheeks as she made her exit. He shouldn't have said that. He loved the woman, he just wanted her safe but maybe she had been right. After all it was Christmas and nobody deserves to be alone then.

"Er, Bolly?" He called uncertainly after her and watched for what seemed like an age as she stopped and turned slowly.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys, just wanted to say thank you for all your support and of course your reviews. **

**I know its February and it's taken this long to finish for a christmas fic but ah well it is snowing after all hahaS**

**So I hope you enjoy the rest of the story and please let me know what you think. **

**Tilly x x x **

The BBC and Kudos own these characters and I own nothing though if you they would like to give me them as a belated christmas present I am certainly not complaining :)

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><p>Chapter 4<p>

"Er, Bolly?" He called uncertainly after her and watched for what seemed like an age as she stopped and turned slowly.

"Gene if you're going to tell me not to bother coming back again. Don't bother. I get the picture."She was starting to walk again when he ran, catching up to her, grabbing her hand and spinning her around.

"Please Bolls. I was wrong; I shouldn't 'ave said about Molly that was below the belt. Tell me about this little trip 'ere? What does it mean?" He pulled her to him, their bodies against each other, one hand on her hip and the other running through her hair. She bit her lip looking towards one of the empty desks before looking back to his eyes, a small smile tugging the corners of her mouth.

"Well, I am only here temporarily. One night Gene, that's all. To make all your Christmas wishes come true." She said seriously, her wide hazel eyes glittering with tears that where threatening to fall, yet she still had that small sweet smile upon her face.

"One night?" Those two words took more effort to force out of his mouth and when they were spoken they came out quiet and scratchy. His hand lifted to her cheek stroking the soft skin as he took in each feature of her heavenly face. He flicked from looking at her eyes that so often changed colour depending on her mood and right now they where a deep hazel and brown giving away her desire. His gaze then flicked to her mouth and he watched how her teeth let her lip free causing them to look full and red. "We had better make the most of it then hadn't we inspector?"

He leaned down feeling her warm soft lips touch his and revelled in the feel of her being back in his arms. The kiss was gentle, soft and explorative as they reacquainted each other but as he felt her fingers pull the back of his hair, he kissed her much more firmly. Quickly things heated up as both their desires, needs and sexual frustration at having had to deny each other for so long finally erupt and they found themselves in a hot frenzy to try to rid each other of their clothes, to be as close to each other as they ever could be both physically and emotionally after being so alone since that night he sent her away. He pushed her backwards, his hands back in her hair and on her hip guiding her as they crossed the room. The top of the table met the top of Alex's legs and she pulled away as she hopped onto it. Gene came close to her again one hand either side of her body placed firmly on the table, leaning so close to her. Alex looked up into his eyes. They were dark silver glittering dangerously of mischief and desire at her and she felt a tightening in the pit of her stomach that sent shocks of lust throughout her body. She grabbed him and brought their lips together in a bruising kiss, her hands fumbling with buttons and other items of clothing. She gasped as she felt his hands touch her bare skin on her waist and run up her ribs and up to her breasts. They were a whirlwind of lust and passion desperate to be together, as one being as they touched, tasted and encouraged each other to climax.

After they reached their goal they were laid down on the carpet behind her desk now basking in their glory, feeling fully sated, relaxed and... happy. For the first time in months Gene Hunt and Alex Drake both felt happiness fulfil them. They lay curled up against one another; Gene had one arm protectively wrapped around her waist and she had her head resting on his chest, she fiddled idly with his gold chain. She brought her hand down to his chest gently and pushed back so that she could look up to see his face. He gazed down at her a small satisfied smile playing on his lips and she smiled back. Alex hadn't wanted to break the silence, didn't want to smash their bliss into tiny pieces but she felt like she needed to say what was on her mind. She stroked his skin on his chest before resting her palm flat against him, she stared at it mesmerised.

"It's still beating" She whispered in awe. "I heard it too, when I was resting,"

Gene still didn't say anything he continued watching her, a quiet sadness in his eyes.

"So beautiful and calming and _safe._" She carried on before giggling suddenly. Gene frowned at her clearly puzzled.

"What are you laughing about Bolly?" He asked nuzzling her soft brown hair and inhaling the scent of her and her shampoo.

"It's beating faster!" She exclaimed quietly thrilled at the small wonder. She expected him to shoot back a sarcastic remark about what they had just been doing but instead she was surprised when he answered quietly, so quietly it was almost to himself and Alex though curled up to him had to strain to her him.

"Of course it's beating faster, you silly mare, you're here." His answer was so strong and definite that tears sprung to Alex's eyes. She thought of how much she had lost in her life or what was her life, she thought of how she had lost Molly, lost him but what caught her off guard and overwhelmed her so much in that moment was how much she truly felt loved.

Alex pushed herself up onto her elbow and Gene held her waist tighter, suddenly afraid that she might leave. Why shouldn't she? She had to go back to the pub anyway and he just acted like the biggest Nancy around. _"You're here" _Could he have sounded more of a puff if he tried? He turned his head away from her, his pout evident now on his lips as he thought about how much of his feelings he had given away to her.

Alex looked up to him, her eyes sparkling with joy but she grew concerned when she saw how he had turned away from her. Did he mean what he had said then? Her own heart skipped a beat and not only did she notice that her own heart was beating faster but hers was in fear. _No, No, No._ The mantra of that word rung in her head, _Please don't do this to me Gene._

She studied him closer, looked at his eyes and breathed a small sigh of relief as she saw his eyes were actually screwed up and his cheeks held a dark blush. Not the pink flush that covered her own body but a dark shade, almost as if he was embarrassed. And that pout, God how she loved it and hated it all at the same time and that was when she realised she hadn't answered him. _Shit. _She knew how he was, her uncomplicated complicated man. Her Guv. Her Gene Genie. Her Manc Lion. She knew that all of these faces of him had only ever showed her one thing – don't show anybody your true feelings- and that was the opposite of what he had just done wasn't it. She had had a glimpse at Gene Hunt. The real man. The man who had feelings, the man she loved. And now she was about to ruin it by not assuring him that it was okay to give in every once in a while. Alex reached up and cupped his cheek, turned his face towards hers and kissed him.

"I love you," She said with sincerity. A simple statement which apparently had the desired effect as his eyes snapped open in shock. She giggled again and smoothed his hair back into place. It was in that moment watching her do that, that he knew that she meant it.

_Sod it. _He thought, _If I'm gunna look like a Jessie might as well do it properly. _He opened his mouth to speak but no sound came out. His brow furrowed and she placed another chaste kiss upon his lips.

"I know," She said, there was no malice or disappointment in her voice, just love.

"I know you know but I want you to know that I know I know." He grinned as she chuckled against him.

"I know you know that I know you kno-" He placed a finger against her lips to quieten her and took a breath.

"I love you Alex." No sooner had the words came out had her mouth crashed onto his. This time lust hadn't overridden them and they took time in bringing each other to release, each calling the others names. When they had reached release, they held onto each other for as long as they could, no words where needed but they had light conversations which soon turned back to a peaceful silence until Alex glanced at the wall clock. She froze, her whole body stiffening. Gene held her tighter, kissing her collarbone.

"What is it Bolls?" He whispered suddenly scared as she buried her face into his neck.

"The time Gene, I have an hour." She mumbled against him and he felt a dampness against his skin. He lifted her face so he could see her and traced finger under her eyes and across her cheeks wiping away her tears.

"Come on we best get dressed, don't want to give Nelson a heart attack do you?" He untangled himself and reached for their scattered clothes. He pulled on his boxers and his trousers as Alex stared at him. He looked at her and sighed coming back to her and squatting to her shortened height as you would a small child.

"Alex, come on love, you know you have to go. I don't want you to leave either you know." He fell backwards onto his bum as she clung to his neck. Huge sobs racking her body. He had frozen for a couple of seconds through awkwardness before he pulled her onto his knee and rubbed her back soothingly as he whispered words of encouragement and love into her ear. After fifteen minutes her sobs had subsided into tiny hiccups and she pulled away kissing him before standing and locating her clothes herself. They finished dressing in silence until she looked self-consciously over her shoulder at him.

"I'm sorry for you know That." She nodded to the where they had been.

"You mean you regret it?" He asked curtly and though he hated to admit it his voice cracked on the last word. Her eyes widened as she realised how he had taken what she had said.

"No! I mean I apologise for you know my little, er, outburst." She cringed as she remembered and this time he chuckled at her, he came over and wrapped his arms around her now clothed body.

"You know I prefer you without all this on" She smiled against his collar.

"I had a feeling you might think that."

"Come on Bolls, let's have drink I think we deserve it don't you." He led her into his office and poured them both some scotch. He handed the glass to her and she nodded her thanks.

"Thirty five minutes left." She said numbly as she took a gulp of the amber liquid, wincing slightly as the fire hit the back of her throat. Gene looked at the clock and sure enough it was twenty five minutes past two.

"Well you're a barrel of laughs aren't you after you've 'ad a good shag." He grumbled more aware of the impending time.

"Do you have to be so crude?" She hissed the weight of the night resting heavily on their shoulders.

"You could at least pretend to be 'appy, you don't have to wallow away all the time y'know." He shot back.

"Well that's rich coming from you. Anyway I am dreadfully sorry to show that I care that I can't stay with you because heaven forbid any sign of feeling from you. So you told me that you love me it doesn't mean that makes you gay or soft." She shouted at him slamming her tumbler on his desk. He smirked briefly before looking down at his shoes his face turning serious again.

"Remind you of old times Bols? All this arguin' and shoutin'?" She turned away from him her arms folded across her chest and a pout upon her lips.

"Thing is Alex, I don't want to remember that you have to go, I want us to enjoy this time together. Bolls? Bolly?" He asked as he looked at her but she had changed. He looked closely at her, her arms weren't folded anymore they were hugging her and her mouth, her lips were trembling. He looked at her eyes and saw the large tears rolling down her cheeks and splashing onto her chest. He came over to her hugged her tightly kissing her dozens of times.

"I'm sorry Alex. I'm so sorry." He said again.

"Do you think it's easy for me Gene? Having to go back there without you? I am so scared of leaving you here alone. I will never know when you will walk through the doors. If you walk through the doors. What if Keats gets to you first? I won't be able to help you, you'll have no one. I want you to stay with me, where you'll be safe and I will be safe." She spoke softly to the dead night.

"I can't Alex. You know that." He said.

"I know." She whispered looking to the floor again.

Gene looked up to the clock twenty five minutes left. _Shit._ He couldn't leave her broken hearted and worried. He kissed her lips and turned around searching the floor until his eyes fell upon the envelope by the waste bin. He walked away from her and noticed how she whimpered inaudibly at his lack of presence. He picked up the packet and came back to her. He held out her hand and tipped the contents into it. Alex looked at the box her eyes glittering dangerously again as she looked at it afraid to open the contents in case she was wrong.

"Bloody hell Bolls, if you cry anymore I might have to invest in a boat and I don't think some poncy white sailor suit will suit me."

She looked at him considering. "Oh, well, I don't know Guv..." She said trailing off a small smile on her lips at the thought.

He frowned at her thinking but stroked her cheek "That's my girl."

Her smile widened at his comment lighting up the room and whilst he enjoyed seeing her smile he grew uncomfortable at the thought that he could have caused it.

"You gunna open it then?" he asked curiously nodding towards the box and she nodded.

She gingerly lifted the case and looked inside her eyes widened and she threw herself at Gene causing him to stumble backwards.

"You have really got to stop doin' that Bollykeks," He said into her ear as she started planting kisses over his face. "Merry Christmas Alex."

"Thank.. you... so.. much.. I thought.. I had.. lost this.. forever" She said in between the kisses.

"You like it then?" He asked chuckling lightly.

"You know I do," She said lightly hitting his arms. "Where did you get it? The jewellers? And when did you get it? It couldn't have been now-"

He cut her off by raising his hand. "Bloody 'ell I'd almost forgotten how much you liked to talk." He laughed at her glare before carrying on "I got it fixed, me an' Ray found it back at that warehouse but the chain had snapped somehow so I took it to the jewellers to get a new one put on. I was gunna give it t'ya for your birthday but then I shot you and well you know the rest. There never felt like a right time after that."

He looked at the ground still feeling guilty over everything that had happened and was surprised to hear her timid voice. "Did I ever tell you Mr. Hunt how much I love you?"

"You've mentioned it once or twice but who doesn't love the Gene Genie charm," he shrugged smiling at her laugh.

"Oh shut up," She said pressing her lips to his before asking him if he would put it on her which he did.

Eventually the time passed by and he walked her out to the pub, they stood outside five minutes to spare. They looked up at its imposing presence.

"I don't want to go Gene." She begged as she stayed in the crook of his arm holding to the lapels of his coat as if he was her lifeline. His hand was on her arse keeping her close, the other on her face.

"You have to."He croaked barely able to form a sentence.

"I know." She said again, they both knew what they had to do but it didn't mean that they wanted to. "Before I go there are two things I want you to remember."

He nodded finding a lump form in his throat.

"Number 1- I love you, I always have and I always will love you." He nodded his eyes glassy as he blinked away his own tears.

"Number two" She whispered pleading with her large doe eyes. "Remember me."

"Always."

He couldn't help the tears that escaped his eyes as she kissed him one final time. She left his embrace and walked over to the doors. She looked over her shoulder towards him as she shook lightly from her sobs and took him in for one last time before entering the doors of the Railway Arms.


End file.
